50 Hilarious “Said No One Evers” That Will Have You Laughing Immediately

Thought Catalog

Eric HeunthepEric Heunthep

1. “I think that car accident was completely my fault.”

2. “What are we going to do with all this leftover cocaine?”

3. “My first sexual experience was by far the best.”

4. “I didn’t think he was that hot, but then I noticed his neck beard.”

5. “The Myers-Briggs test taught me a lot about myself.”

6. “Why is it so difficult to find a Starbucks?”

7. “I’m moving to the suburbs because they have such a lively art scene.”

8. “I would start Michael Vick on my fantasy team, but I just don’t agree with his morals.”

9. “Scientology does a nice job of filling in the holes left by Christianity and Islam.”

10. “I think what today’s society needs most is another show about New Jersey.”

>11. “Sorry I can’t come out tonight, I’m watching the Charles in Charge marathon.”

12. “I wish my mom…

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